Joy, week 36
I have never in my life been so thankful for the Sabbath day as I have today. For a variety of reasons, the weekend was incredibly intense. Our schedule was intense, it was emotionally intense, physically intense. I had to be on my game in every way with some complex things going on. I think it worked out well enough, and we literally fell into this day of rest with grateful hearts. All of us.
Another busy week. Busier than we’ve had in a while now that we’re back to a six days/week soccer life, with lacrosse to keep things hopping as well. But let me tell you, I’m thankful for these things. I’m grateful my children have activities to participate in. I’m grateful they’re willing to participate. I’m so thankful my girls have a place to go where it doesn’t matter what you look like or who likes you or anything else. All that matters at soccer is how hard you work and what you DO. I think that’s a big deal for girls in our world, and this week I felt particularly grateful for it. We had some doctor’s appointments, a daddy/daughter activity, several one on one outings with some of the children, the list goes on.
I feel like things are coming together a little during the day. My youngest two are struggling to fall into a good school routine and we’re still working at that. Either they’re happy or incredibly grouchy and needy. I still need to potty train my youngest and start several things, but it’s coming. I’m enjoying taking the girls for a walk in the mornings and I’m enjoying the projects I’ve been able to tackle. The biggest ones are still untouched, and the yard is in desperate need, but I’m happy to be moving forward. Our piano and violin practices need to improve, which can be tricky. It’s hard to find 2.5 hours in the day for five children to practice! When you find it, the second battle is keeping them at it. Often the second battle is harder than the first.
I want to get better at prepping dinner in the morning. That needs work and would probably help with our piano routine.
There were fun times as well. Conversations with a few friends, storytime with bodies piled all around you, tickle torture for persistent toddlers, blue skies and puffy white clouds to look up and notice, crickets chirping outside our windows at night, sunrises that join you in waking all the children for school. Oh, it’s a wonderful life!
There is a feeling I’ve had for the past couple of weeks, and it got stronger this week. There are battles to fight and lines to draw and hold fast to when you’re raising a family. You do it to protect and nurture your children. There are things we have to do that are hard to do. They complicate daily life. They add a lot of emotional weight to the day. We rarely speak of them because of their relevance to private battles our youth face. But they need to be done and so we do them. It’s as simple as that. Sometimes doing those things in addition to all the other daily things can really max us out, but still we can’t let up because it’s simply not an option. And as hard as those things can be, they add a precious dimension of satisfaction at the end of the day because you did what needed to be done. Not always perfectly, mind you, but enough. Good enough. And good enough can be pretty awesome if we’re consistent.
So that’s my report. I’m giving everything I can and know of to do in my effort to be a “good enough” parent. I’m trying to be consistent. I’m learning to lean a little more on the Lord for that extra strength and presence of mind. I’m working harder to make life fun and to keep smiles on all our faces. I’m determined to win the battles we have to fight. It is exhausting and challenging but it is also amazing. And it’s fun. I’m so thankful it’s my life.