A Year of Habits, no. 25
June is almost over. The cool weather slowly gives way to warm and then in a moment it’s hot. We reluctantly closed our windows and turned on the air conditioning this week when our kids just couldn’t fall asleep. Nice as it is to have the cool air indoors I’ve missed waking to the sound of a symphony of birds outside our windows.
We’re working hard on the habit of obedience at our house. It’s really my number one goal for the summer. It also means that we’re making progress in many housekeeping areas which is a relief. I’m not naturally good at teaching my children how to work but am trying to improve. I realize that too often I’ve worked quietly while they’ve played because it gives me joy to see them play together in healthy ways, especially when I feel like our busy lives don’t allow enough time for it. My natural inclination to seek some quiet moments hasn’t helped. Sometimes cleaning alone is the most privacy I have in a day and I need to welcome the noise and bring the children in for what I’m doing. I’ve made a mistake in so doing, and am trying to fix it.
Reading. I’m reading a lot and am happy with the pace at which I’m making my way through the heavy historical reading I’m so drawn to. In an act of great discipline I read a novel last week as well. More on that soon.
Creativity: I found time to do a little sewing (thanks to a deadline) and have tried a few recipes.
Finishing: This week I finished two projects that needed attention.
Maintaining: I feel good about my work in our yard and am grateful I find it so enjoyable.
Exercise: I did better this week and particularly enjoyed a fun walk with my dear friend Jana. It was a great morning (thanks, my friend!)
Thoughtfulness & Service: I just realized that yesterday was another friend’s birthday and I didn’t make it to her house before we drove out of town again. (Sorry Julene!) I’ll have to repent of that when we get back.
Changing gears: This habit wasn’t one I had chosen when I started the year, but it’s become something I’m working at daily. I’m earnestly trying to relax and enjoy what is going on in the present without being preoccupied by other worries and concerns. I had a few times when I wasn’t successful at this but I feel that I’m really learning to relax and enjoy the moment, then get back to serious work when it’s time.
Journals: I’ve fallen off this habit as my reading has picked up. I’m going to work on that this week.
And so, while I should have come up with a more scientific way to measure these rather ambiguous goals (so like me), I feel like I’m lengthening my stride somewhat and I like the feel of it.
We’re in Newport Beach for our annual week at the beach. I love the sounds of cars and people walking by the house to get to the sand. I love the smell, the sights, the ocean, the house. But the stilled voice of my Grandpa was more than I could take. We pulled in last night, got out of the car, opened the garage, went in the house and I found myself wandering around. I realized I was feeling anxious because I hadn’t yet heard his wonderful laugh and his “Hi Jen!” It was more than I could handle and while my family ran to the beach I stayed in the house and had a good cry. My three year old daughter cried with me while she said “I love you so much Mommy” over and over again. I have visited this house all my life, and every time he’s been here to greet us. Until now. And it hurts. I miss him so much and hope he is able to see how much we love and appreciate him.
So we’ll enjoy the beach with all our hearts because that’s what he would want us to do.