A Year of Habits, no. 32

I just read an email with a funny comment in it:  It’s half-past August.  So it is.  I’m pretty sure the rest of the month will feel about thirty  minutes long, too.

I find myself looking around with mixed feelings.  I’m looking at my Helpful Habits list from January, seeing progress in some areas, feeling disgusted in others, and wondering what I was thinking in yet others.  I’m looking at my summer list with heart torn between all we did and all we didn’t get to.  I’m looking at the back to school rush already underway wishing I could stop it while knowing I’ve already been swept away by the tidal wave of activity and expectation which August always brings.   The result?  A mixture of satisfaction, longing, disappointment and determination. And stress.  Lots of stress.

We had a good week, although a busy one.  We went to the elementary school to look at class lists.  Three days were spent at a soccer tournament which ate up most of my housekeeping time.  It was enjoyable and I love watching my children play, but it did feel like a sacrifice.  I wanted to do so much more.

We celebrated a birthday this week.  It was wonderful but brought it’s own bittersweet emotions to sort through.  I am grateful for my children.   I squeezed in some creative efforts as part of our celebration which always brings some satisfaction.

A soft reply.  I definitely struggled in this area.  I let the stress I’m feeling get to me and it influenced the way I responded to my family.  Yesterday I was downright grumpy.  This is #1 on my list of things to correct in the coming week.

Finishing.  This is an area that makes me a little discouraged.  I thought I’d finish more projects this summer than I have actually completed.  I don’t like that.

Health:  I’m still working on eating well and have lost some weight but hit a plateau that I haven’t been able to shake for a few weeks.  Time to re-focus my efforts and be more diligent.

Work.  I feel like we’ve improved this summer in the work department.  The children are doing more around the house, and generally their attitudes while working has improved as well.  We’ve got to keep at it but we have made progress.

The house.  It’s relatively clean but every time I feel like we’ve mastered something I turn around and discover another mess somewhere.  My two year old is a terror.  Twice in the last 24 hours she’s found markers or ink of some kind and done real damage with it.  Grrr.  Good thing she knows how to say “sorry” so sweetly.  I will admit to shedding tears over something she ruined.  Nothing valuable, just meaningful to me personally.

We did have a good week.  In spite of soccer games, practices and scrimmages, I managed to get my oldest son to three different skate parks in three different cities which he loved.  I took the children on a little adventure (more on that tomorrow) and we spent an afternoon visiting cousins.  We hung out with my brother and his fiance, spent time with neighbors, invited friends over for root beer floats, and I had my first four hour around town driving session since June.  We made homemade frozen yogurt, played outside with neighbors, planted two pear trees and read good books.  I am grateful for little moments in the midst of it all when I look around and see children happily interacting with one another.

Another week beckons us with things we still want to do, things we must do, and fewer blank spaces on the calendar.  It is what it is.  I can’t hold back the tide, so I need to take a deep breath and jump in.  I’m working on it.

Have a great week!


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