Hopeful Homemaker

May 22, 2013
by jennifer
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Modern Medallion Border 5

The Utah County Modern Quilt Group met last Saturday morning, and I stayed up ridiculously late Friday night, determined to finish another border in time to share it at the meeting.

In these photos the quilt top is hanging over a window, so the back lighting shows all the seams and makes the colors look more saturated than they otherwise would, but I think it looks kind of cool.

One of the leaders of the group did this border on her quilt and I really liked the mosaic feel it had. My measurements are different than hers, but construction was the same. To make mine, I needed 28 – 6.5 inch squares. Each square is made up of a nine patch block, and the “squares” in each block are two rectangles.

To make my border, I cut 30 – 1.5 inch wide strips of fabric (averaging about 41 inches long). I paired the strips, starched them carefully so they wouldn’t begin to curve, and sewed them together. This gave me 15 strips of fabric that was now 2.5 inches wide.

I then cut each strip into 2.5 inch widths. I then started laying the squares out in three strips of three blocks, with the blocks alternating in a horizontal and vertical orientation. I pieced these together until I made 28 of them, then made two rows of 6 and two rows of 8 blocks. They were then sewn to the quilt and it now measures 48.5 inches square.

Now I have decisions to make. I want to keep adding borders to this quilt, but I also need to start deciding how large I’m going to let it be. One thing is certain: I am loving this project!

Jennifer

May 22, 2013
by jennifer
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15 Days of Happiness :: Do Something You Enjoy

This morning I woke up and knew I should hit the list, get going and make sure I was super-effective all day.

I got the children off to school, made a phone call, and then I couldn’t do it.

We live in a society that expects us to be constantly productive, and in all honesty I enjoy being productive, staying busy, etc. But it’s true that if we don’t have any margin, if we’re scheduling every minute of every day, we’re going to burn out. That’s the feeling I had this morning. A week and a half left of school and I kind of don’t care because I’m burning out. We can’t function on empty. This morning I decided to take control of my schedule by making time to do something enjoyable.

I took my timer to my sewing table and made a quilt block. Then I set it again and made another. (You can see the blocks here.) I feel happier because I allowed myself to do something I enjoy. It wasn’t urgent, it wasn’t related to a deadline or a school, and it wasn’t necessary. But it did the trick.

Today I hope you’ll find even a few minutes to do something that is enjoyable to you, something that perhaps feels like an indulgence you can’t afford right now (I’m talking time, not money). Decide how much time you are willing to give it and then let yourself relax and enjoy it. Now I feel refreshed and ready to jump back in, which is a good thing because my afternoon is packed!

Good luck!
Jennifer

May 21, 2013
by jennifer
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15 Days of Happiness :: Live in the Moment

Someone once said “We do not remember days; we remember moments.” I agree with this. Each day is filled with so many moments we really don’t remember them all, but I also find that when I live in the moment I am able to grab more of them, and sometimes much of a day is recorded in my heart by consciously memorizing moments.

I’m doing this little happiness challenge because I know I’m in some of the hardest weeks of my year. It was late last night when my youngest daughter, who is a terrible sleeper, finally gave up:

Today I admit I feel a lot like she looks. I haven’t had enough sleep in weeks, and this morning as I held a grouchy toddler on my lap I almost fell asleep doing it! And yet, there is nothing I can do to slow down just yet. The sprint must continue.

In a few minutes I will leave to pick up 7 children from school early, drive two of them home as a favor to a friend, then take the others back to the school (feeding them lunch in the car) for some end-of-year testing. From there we will pick up my older students and begin the weekly shuttling that piano lessons require. Sandwiched in there we have math homework to complete, an after school obligation, and a soccer game to get ready for. I don’t yet know how I’m going to get the soccer player to her game on time and the kids home from piano. I don’t know how the house will get clean for tonight’s party or what my family will eat for dinner while I host another party. I know it will all work out; I just don’t know how to make some of it work yet, and that’s a stress. As I’ve had these thoughts racing through my mind all morning, I realized that I am making my day harder by worrying about it all at once. It’s not even noon and I’m worried about 5 pm and 7 pm and so forth.

So I took a deep breath and remembered that I can lighten my load if I deal with the day sequentially. I’ll tackle what’s in front of me right now, and soon I will have navigated the day successfully. I can also remind myself that I knew this day would be nuts, which is why I got everything ready for the party in advance. Relief!

My #1 priority for the next 10 hours is to live in the moment. There is so much to enjoy if I’m not racing ahead of myself mentally. The top picture of my daughter giggling on my bed came in a stressful moment and I’m so glad now that I paused to enjoy her for 30 seconds.

I paused at the soccer field on Saturday to marvel at the beauty of the location, the beauty of the mountains, the green grass, the clouds and sky. I turned in a circle and took in every angle, wishing my husband was there with me to enjoy it. I memoried it, and have re-lived it in my mind many times since. The moment is frozen in my heart as a happy one simply because I paused.

Yesterday was a rush as well. How glad I am today that I paused for a moment to read and photograph this to-do list, created by my daughter before she left for school. The chalkboard is now covered with something else and that sweet list is gone. I’m so glad I read it and shared it, because the Smiths, who were driving for 8 hours to get to our house, enjoyed it too.

I’m setting my timer for 15 minutes to clean as fast as I can. Then we’re off for several hours. Before I go to bed tonight I will write in my journal at least 5 moments I was present for, 5 moments I memorized because I wasn’t rushing ahead.

I hope you’ll join me!

Jennifer

May 20, 2013
by jennifer
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15 Days of Happiness :: Try Something New

Studies have shown that novelty and challenge bring happiness, so today my happiness task was to try something new. I had to send a dessert somewhere, so I tested this recipe for Coconut Oatmeal Cookies.

Granted, making these cookies wasn’t much of a challenge, but tasting them as a family did add a feeling of novelty to the afternoon. (And by the way, they’re delicious! Even my children who avoid coconut were begging for more.) It’s nice to do something different, nice to add a new recipe to the file of favorites, nice to be out of the rut.

What new thing can you try today? What challenge could you tackle that would make you feel good about yourself?

I’ll share a challenge I’ve been working on for the past year or so. I’m kind of a homebody and tend to be uncomfortable with big group activities. Give me one or two people to talk to and I’ll make friends quickly, but throw me into a large group get-to-know-you game and I feel like running. This can sometimes make me hesitate to plan parties for my kids, so I’ve been consciously working on throwing fun parties, particularly for my teenagers and older children. I’m lucky to have a good friend who I regard as a master party planner and I’ve called her for suggestions and advice. I’ve had the opportunity to throw some parties for girls soccer teams this year and because I researched, planned well, and went in with a smile, they have gone well. We had one here last Saturday night and when the house finally quieted down I was happy in the knowledge that 15 girls had a great time at my house.

Tomorrow night I’m throwing a second party for my 10 year old daughter’s team. I’m both more and less nervous. Less nervous because I think they’ll have a nice time; more nervous because I don’t have much time to clean the house and do the last minute rushing around that always comes with parties. Either way, it’s going to happen and I’m going to get better at acquiring the skill of planning great parties.

In her awesome book, The Happiness Project, Gretchen Rubin says this, “One reason that challenge brings happiness is that it allows you to expand your self-definition. You become larger…. Research shows that the more elements make up your identity, the less threatening it is when any one element is threatened.” (p.78)

Whatever it is, trying something novel and/or challenging will make you a better person. Don’t forget the 15 minute approach if this sounds like too much work. Choose a challenge, set a timer, and see what happens. Have fun!

May 19, 2013
by jennifer
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Simple. Quality. no. 20

This has been the strangest month. It is flying by and yet I can’t believe there are still two weeks to go. For the most part I am pleased with what has been accomplished this month and hope I can maintain my mental energy for all that remains. It’s a sprint to June! And now for my summary:

S – Smile and savor. I started my 15 days of Happiness series here on Hopeful Homemaker, but was so busy that I didn’t report on Friday or Saturday. I need to do that. There have been a lot of happy moments this week, even though it was a tough week.

I – Influence. I blogged more, which is good. I realized there is someone who I have felt for years did not like me, and so I tense up when I know I’m going to be around this individual. In an honest evaluation, I realized that my tension was probably half of the problem and possibly made the other person feel like I did not like them. I took a deep breath and explained my feelings, then apologized for not being bigger and more gracious. It turns out I was right, we both felt like the other person didn’t like them, although neither of us had any real feelings of dislike. I am so glad that I repented!

M – My health. I had a good week, drinking tons of water and fitting in exercise where I could. I look forward to the summer schedule which accommodates this priority much more easily than the school year does.

P – Participate. I went to my quilt group yesterday and had a great time with my sister. The winding down of soccer seasons brings bittersweet feelings. I have come to really like the mothers of the girls on that team and after two years of following our daughters around to support them, they’ve become friends. I will miss the conversations we have together and hope things go well with try-outs!

L – Live ahead. I feel good about my planning for the activities we have coming up. Last night I threw a party for my daughter’s soccer team and it was a complete success. I feel like I have a good start on all the things I’m responsible for in the next 6 weeks.

E – Embrace technology. I’m doing most of my planning on my phone lately, so I’m making fewer paper lists. I never thought I’d like it but my husband introduced me to Google Keep and it’s perfect for me. I love being able to have a list for each of the different things I’m working on, each a different color, and all of them right there together for me to scroll through.

Simple. Life is not simple right now, but I’m trying to do simple things to improve. My attention to my personal goals has been spotty in this month that requires such focus on school and other family matters. It will be nice to balance my focus more during the summer.

Q – Quality of Life Factor. This area is still going well and I’m thrilled! I keep getting behind on laundry, but the house in general is holding up under the pressure of the season and I’m getting rid of things daily. We didn’t have to scurry around much to get ready for last night’s party and it felt good.

U – urgency in important matters. Well, everything feels urgent right now. I’m doing my best to keep track of it all, write things down, and when I feel like I can’t do it all just take a deep breath. I have a couple of friends who inspire me and when I feel tired or overwhelmed I ask myself what they would do. Then the smile comes and I’m happy to keep working so that I can become more like them.

A – Aim higher. It’s interesting to watch all my students as deadlines pile up and projects are due. For the most part they’re all doing a good job of working hard. My 12 year old son approached me on Thursday night and asked if we could kidnap one of his best friends for an early morning birthday breakfast on Saturday. I looked at the calendar and it was rather full, but then I thought how great it was that he had this desire to do something fun for his friend. These impulses are the things I need to encourage so my kids will form habits of excellence and thoughtfulness. I called the friend’s mother and told her our idea, and the sound of her voice when she heard it told me we were doing the right thing. Big time. So the two of us got up early to go pick up friends and have a fun breakfast. I’m so proud of him for thinking of it and making it happen. I also enjoyed watching my 3rd grader work hard on a history project.

L – Laugh. I’ve been pretty stressed with my oldest son and today I’ve completely relaxed and am trying to reboot our relationship a little. I’m smiling, laughing, complimenting. I still have much to learn as a mother, especially with the older children. Yesterday when I had 15 teen-aged girls at my house playing Snatch the Rat I turned and saw my husband laughing as he watched them play. I was laughing too, laughing so hard my cheeks hurt. I realized I need to laugh more every day.

I – Inject the Spirit. We memorized a quote as a family this week. I didn’t feel as successful with this, although today has been better.

T – Take Inventory. I haven’t addressed this lately, other than to get rid of things. I’m on a mission to let it go and simplify as much as possible.

Y – Yes to youth. Huge success this week with the team party. One of my specific goals has been to do things that will help my daughter WANT to have friends at our house. The party was an opportunity for her to have a large group of girls over and I think she felt good about it. I certainly did! Things like this are NOT a natural talent for me but I’m making myself learn the skill of planning fun parties and it’s nice to have a success.

So, with the family I feel successful. There’s a lot I haven’t taken care of but it seems to be working out and the Lord has been kind to us as well. While we’re still under stress, I’m exhausted, the children are all over-tired, and life feels crazy, I think this is the best May we’ve had in years. We’re weathering it well. (Knock on wood!) And when it’s hard, I remember last year, with a son on crutches and how much harder it was. In all, I suppose the best feeling of all is the sense that I might actually be growing into this new stage of motherhood. I feel like I have a shot at getting good at it and I cannot tell you how happy that makes me. And so I work harder, pray more, and remind myself that right now is all I really have. Life is great!

Have a good week,

Jennifer

May 18, 2013
by jennifer
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15 Days of Happiness :: Give a Gift

There’s nothing like receiving an unexpected gift. I’m pretty sure that the only thing better is giving the unexpected gift. Once upon a time I felt like I was a really good gift-giver. It was back when I only had a few little children and I was pretty much still in control of my life. I had more energy and resources than they required of me, so I focused on becoming a good giver of gifts.

As our family became larger and the older children required more (and ate more!) my time and resources were all directed toward simply taking care of my family and I didn’t have much money, time or creativity left for giving gifts. I began to hesitate to give them because I felt they weren’t good enough, and they certainly didn’t feel like an adequate expression of my regard.

I’m repenting of this folly. Each of us is of infinite worth. There will never be a thing I can give to someone that could possibly match their worth. Some of the gifts I give will be perfect and some may feel more like I’m offering dandelions instead of roses. But a gift is a gift, and if it’s offered from my heart with sincerity then that is good enough. We must learn to give gifts without expecting a certain response, expression of gratitude, reciprocation of gifts or recognition. When we let go of all expectation and simply give the gift with no emotional strings attached, we experience joy. The purity of our intent allows us to feel joy in the giving no matter the reception.

I am also learning how to give gifts that are hard to give. Perhaps it’s a thing we hesitate to part with, or time we don’t feel like we have. We can give “expensive” gifts without spending a penny when we share our time and efforts. These gifts are, in some ways, the healthiest to give. They stretch us and make us bigger than we were.

I recently gave a treasured out-of-print book to a friend. It wasn’t easy to part with a favorite I may never see again, but it was the right thing to do and has made me happy every time I reflect on it. Simple little things like a package of mints or a bottle of favorite nail polish can be delightful if wrapped with a pretty ribbon and a kind note. It takes effort, but the return is totally worth it.

Today, give a gift. Maybe you just finished reading a book you enjoyed. Wrap it up and give it to a friend. Stopping at the grocery store? Grab an extra pound of strawberries, tie a bow around them, and write a note to someone telling them how much you appreciate them. Keep it simple, but put your heart into it. It only needs to take 5 minutes but it will make you happy.

Have a great day!

Jennifer

May 17, 2013
by jennifer
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15 Days of Happiness :: Enjoy the Flowers

In my flowerbeds I planted Ranonculus several years ago. In my climate it’s supposed to be an annual, but apparently there’s a little micro-climate in my yard that they survive in. I wondered when we had sub-zero temperatures for so long this winter if they would make it or not. Imagine my happiness to see their leaves poking out of the ground a few weeks ago.

They’re small flowers, but are possibly my favorite flower ever. They come and go quickly in my garden so I have to consciously stop when I notice them or they’ll fade by the time I remember to go back.

So many things in life are like this. We think they’ll still be around for us to enjoy when we have time, but the world keeps spinning and many of life’s simple joys must be appreciated NOW.

I’m a big fan of enjoying the flowers in life. Studies have shown repeatedly that fresh flowers boost our spirits and increase happiness. So head out to the garden and enjoy yours. Stop along the side of the road to look at some. Pop into a flower shop and treat yourself to a bouquet, or if that’s too much, buy a single bloom and bring it home. Maybe you could buy two and share one with a friend. It doesn’t matter if you buy them yourself or if they’re given to you; they bring happiness just the same.

Study your flower. Smell it. Notice the layers of petals, the lines, the curve of the stem. Notice how saturated with color they are. Study them and remember that the God who created these masterpieces also created you.

I wish I had a field of flowers I could cut, bundle and send to everyone I know.

I think I need to head outside for another look!

Happy Living,
Jennifer

May 16, 2013
by jennifer
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15 Days of Happiness :: A Deep Breath

I’ll be honest. It hasn’t been the happiest day. It’s been a rugged day, full of unexpected complications. My mother’s heart carries a private weight that makes buoyancy difficult. Nothing catastrophic; the weight of life is heavier sometimes. Knowing I needed to write this post has had me thinking about happiness all day.

Every year I particularly love watching my Iceland poppies bloom. There is something so touching about the way they bow their heads as the pod bulges with potential. They remind me of those private moments when we quietly bow our heads to take the blows of life and gather the energy to lift our chins once more. They remind me of a mother summoning the strength to bring forth life. It is part of the process of making wonderful things happen, and I love how my flowers teach me this lesson anew each spring.

I’ve thought today about how happiness isn’t just a buoyant feeling we feel. It’s also something quiet and steady we can learn to tap into. Like the coals that burn long after the flames have died down, I think we can learn to find happiness in foundational things even when the days are hard.

Some of the quiet, steady blessings I reflected on today are: a loving husband who is consistent, my children who still love me even at the end of my lousy days, knowing that I stand on the shoulders of giants – amazing people in my own family tree whose lives are/were solid and true, the sun that rises and sets each day, the relief of praying to God who holds the future, the ability to hold very still and breathe deeply. Pausing in my complicated day to consider these things was my bowing, summoning, remembering. I felt like my poppy.

It’s ok to have tough days. Sometimes we have tough weeks, or even years. If we can pause to stoke the coals of faith, remembrance and hope we will find the strength to be steady and to hang on to the happy things that are ours.

So today my act of happiness was a deep breath. Several of them.

My deep breath allowed me to put the day in perspective. I counted so many blessings: the smell of my daughter’s hair as she climbed up on my lap, helping a daughter make a new friend, listening to my little girls play school together, taking care of something important, brainstorming a plan for my son to surprise a friend on his birthday, going on a bike ride, cleaning with my daughters, the sound of sprinklers, the neighborhood children playing in my yard, noticing how full of life and beauty my eight year old daughter’s face looked on the way home from school, a cool evening breeze. The noticing of these little things reminds me that after the bowed head comes a face lifted to the sun.

Sometimes happiness is knowing that soon we’ll bloom again.

Jennifer

May 15, 2013
by jennifer
3 Comments

Medallion Quilt Top: Border 4

I managed to get the 4th border on my medallion quilt, and that’s no small accomplishment at this time of year! (My 15 minute approach was what made it happen.)

For this border I went with half square triangles made from two of the prints in the Carnaby Street collection by Pat Bravo. I really like how the pink and citron are so unexpected.

For the corner blocks I made a simple pinwheel using solid fabrics. The pink and yellow are similar but a little brighter and I’m pleased with how the corners stand out without competing with the rest of the border.

How I made it:

Half square triangles: cut 20 – 4 inch squares of two contrasting fabrics. Use these squares to make 40 half square triangles. Trim them to 3.5 inches square. Sew 10 squares together. Make four strips. Strips should be 3.5 inches wide and 30.5 inches long.

Corner pinwheels: cut 8 – 2 5/8 inch squares of two contrasting fabrics. Make16 half square triangles. Trim to 2 inches square. Sew four squares together to make pinwheel. Make sure pinwheel block is 3.5 inches square. Sew a pinwheel block to both ends of two of the half square triangle strips.

Attach the border: carefully pin and sew a strip of pinwheels to one side of your medallion quilt top. Press. Attach a second strip to the opposite side of the medallion. Carefully pin and sew a strip with pinwheels to one of the remaining sides. Repeat with remaining border. The quilt top should now measure 36.5 inches square.

This is a medallion quilt of my own creation. You can see previous posts, including measurements and other instructions (including where to find the paper pieced arrow pattern), in these posts:

Lone Star Medallion center

Lone Star medallion center tutorial

Paper Pieced Arrow

Arrow Border and Border #3

I’ve started working on border #5 and am excited to see how it looks. This quilt top is turning out to be one of the most fun projects I’ve ever worked on. And my Marcelle Medallion? Still hanging in the sewing room, waiting for the flying geese border. Hopefully I’ll get to it soon.

Happy Sewing!
Jennifer

Linking to Freshly Pieced

May 15, 2013
by jennifer
2 Comments

15 Days of Happiness :: Make Time Your Friend

We’re all busy, with more to do than time to do it in. One of the greatest drains on my happiness is the feeling that time is my enemy. When I feel like I don’t have time to do what I should, I end up feeling helpless. The garage I don’t have time to clean becomes a source of guilt, the project I don’t have time to finish becomes mere clutter, the laundry I don’t have time to fold sits in a pile, the dream I don’t have time to chase taunts me as my day-to-day life holds no promise of improvement. I think we’re all like that. We feel like we don’t have time to finish so we never start. We don’t have time to do it right so we don’t do it at all. We don’t have time to be thoughtful so we aren’t. We don’t have time to organize our whole life so we just give up and keep on as we have been. The list goes on and on.

I’ve learned that it’s not really time that robs me of happiness. It’s my perception of time. We all have the same 24 hours in a day. In this life is 100% fair. Sure, we all have different constraints on our time, and we have different stages of life that govern how most of our time is spent. But we all have time. In order to have time be a source of happiness instead of a drain on happiness, we have to make it our ally.

Enter my kitchen timer.

I may not be able to work for several hours on a project and see it to completion all at once, but I have fifteen minutes. Somewhere in my day I can find 15 minutes to invest in the life I want to live.

This morning I took the timer in my closet and set it for 15 minutes. I quickly cleared the floor of clutter, then briefly went through my hanging clothes. Every time I found something I haven’t worn in a year, I tossed in a bag. Then I quickly got a couple of boxes down from my top shelf to see what was in them. To my surprise I found some maternity clothes I had forgotten about. Two minutes later I had 4 empty boxes and 5 bags of clothing to get rid of this afternoon. Yes!

My closet isn’t finished. There is more to go through, but I started something I’ve been avoiding and did far more in 15 minutes than I thought I could.

Right now my timer is ticking away for a 15 minute blogging break.

Yesterday the timer was there when I weeded one of the flower beds outside.

In a few minutes I’ll use it to tackle a pile of clutter on the kitchen counter.

Using 15 minutes to work on something I don’t have time to do makes me feel like I’m in control of time. It reminds me that I don’t need long segments of time to make improvements in my life. I can do something small right now, in the next 15 minutes! When these few minutes become valuable simply by changing my perception of them, time becomes my friend. It is my tool, given to me by a loving God to make good use of. He knows that he’s given me more to do than I can possibly accomplish, and he wants to see what kind of decisions I’m going to make with my time. Some decisions I made a long time ago; when I decided to have a large family I chose to have more cooking, cleaning, housework and driving to do than many other mothers. It eats up most of my time, but not every single minute. I have 15 minutes, and a steady 15 minutes each day can work miracles.

Today, set a timer for 15 minutes and do something awesome. It doesn’t matter that you finish, only that you do it. Do it every day. It will make you happy.

I promise!

Good luck, and happy living,

Jennifer