Mystery of the day

At approximately 5:30 a.m. my 6 1/2 month old baby went back to her bed.  With a full stomach and fully clothed, she slept peacefully until she woke up again around 9:00, kicking and waving her arms and growling and smiling.

And naked.

WHAT?  How on earth did that happen?

Her clothes were laying next to her in her crib, completely snapped up.


A quick check of all other occupants of our home confirmed that NO ONE had been near her.

How on earth did she get out?

She seems pretty pleased with her accomplishment.  My only guess is that she somehow wriggled her entire body out the neck.  (Keep in mind that the baby monitor was on and we heard…. nothing.)

I’m afraid we may have a baby Houdini on our hands.

And with that, I’ll wish you a happy day.

Trying to keep my children dressed, Hopeful Homemaker

My (slightly) embarrassing morning

This morning my children did NOT look like this:


I sure wish they had.  My day so far would have been different if they had.  Instead, my two and three year olds woke up with their boxing gloves on.  Big time.

It started innocently enough, with this little conversation:
boy:  “I woke up at seven.”
girl:  “Oh yeah!  I oke up at sits (six).”

The girl then wags her little hips and says “Mm  Mmmmm!” in a nice in-your-face way that is actually cute but only because she’s so little, and you can’t even crack a smile because it most definitely won’t be cute when she’s older.

Remember, neither of them have any concept of time.  They had no clue what they were talking about, only that they were trying to 0ne-up each other.  We went downhill from there, and after a little while I realized that my best option was to just do my best to stay between them.  While feeding the baby, cleaning up breakfast, etc.

Let me interject here that my usual routine is to get up and get ready for the day before I wake my kids up for school.  Due to lack of sleep, however, my second choice is to get the kids off for school and then shower right after they leave.  I usually have a tiny window of time between the good-byes and the waking up of my three littlest, so I’ve traded some productivity for the chance to sleep longer and try to catch up on my rest.  Well, this morning that tiny window never presented itself and it was plain to see that I couldn’t risk leaving the two toddlers alone even for 5 minutes because of their bickering.  SO, I figured I’ll just shower during naptime.

Except for the fact that I had to run some food to a funeral this morning.  Now, I can count on ONE HAND the number of days I’ve gone in public without a shower since #8 was born.  I can think of only 3, including today.  I’ve still got weight to lose and so forth, but I do try to take care of myself and look good every day.  I really didn’t think that I was risking too much if I just ran in the back door to the kitchen at the church, dropped off my food, and took off.  So I put on a sweatshirt, brushed my hair into a ponytail, and donned my favorite hat.  Off we went.

Here’s where it gets embarrassing.

I walked through the back door into the kitchen at the church, and guess who was standing there?

Julie Beck
, General President of the Relief Society organization for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints .  Yep.  It was her, all right.  Looking tall, thin, and VERY classy.  She was there to attend the funeral.  She’d just popped into the kitchen to check on the ladies who would be serving everybody lunch after the funeral, because that’s just one of the things that Relief Society sisters do (and in my ward, its something we seem to do almost monthly).

I had to laugh at the irony of it all.  Attending to my first responsibility as a mother this morning made me look like a total loser in front of someone I really admire.  Oh well.   Naturally it had to happen on the ONLY occasion I’ve ever stepped into a church looking like this.

I drove away laughing at my luck.  Then I remembered that I’d agreed to take my son’s library book to his classroom when I picked up my kindergartener.  With a deep breath, I headed into the school, prepared to face the two lovely ladies who work at the front desk who always look great and who have like 2 kids each and who probably already think I’m a complete crazy woman. (Yes, that was a run on sentence.  I intended it to be one.)  Well, not only were they in the office, but every other mom I know happened to be there, too!  Looking fabulous, of course.  They were re-decorating the front office for a new month, in their fashionable ruffles and cute skirts and so forth.  You know how cute they looked.  And here I am, the crazy woman with 8 kids, in her sweats and a hat, with a Calvin & Hobbes book in hand.

So I took a deep breath, told them all my story about meeting Julie Beck in the kitchen, congratulated them all on looking fabulous and perfectly ready to meet Julie Beck with no warning, wished them a great day, took the book to my son, and left.

Then I came home, broke up another fight between my little boxers, and wrote this.

Warning to you all:  never go anywhere without a shower and makeup.

Hoping for a shower…..
Jennifer

Sunday Silliness


silly girl

It all started this afternoon.

I was making dinner, Mr. Wonderful was taking a much-deserved Sunday nap.  The children were upstairs, supposedly having quiet time in their respective bedrooms.  Is it too much to hope that some quality reading could take place somewhere in there, too?  Slowly they gravitated to the bedroom of the oldest, and thus began a new Olympic event.

Tech Decks.  They started taking turns doing tricks on the Tech Deck half-pipe and giving each other scores, similar to the snowboarding half-pipe they watched 10 days ago.  Medals were awarded, and I believe there might have been just a TAD bit of disagreement about some of the judging.  It’s very subjective, you know.  I knew what they were up to and let them do it, remembering that other world of childhood memories from my own life, the world that happens when it’s just the kids together, doing whatever their imaginations dream up, outside of the involvement of their parents.

We ate dinner together.  It was relatively normal, with someone refusing to put much of anything on their plates, and at least two others enjoying the experience of decorating their plates with food and then deciding they weren’t hungry.  Most of the rest ate a decent meal, and it was time to clean the kitchen.

That was when the first signs of extreme silliness crept into my consciousness.  Suddenly there was a small contention brewing and in an attempt to diffuse it I started singing a song, inviting them to join in.  My oldest daughter suggested the next one, and soon all of the children were singing a lovely song about faith in Jesus Christ when my oldest began accompanying their performance with “weeumbaweha” every couple of lines (think In the Jungle the Lion Sleeps Tonight).  What do you do?  Laugh.  What else can you do?

Things went steadily downhill from there.  Fast forward to bedtime, and we’re playing Whack-A-Mole with them, trying to get them all in bed to stay.  One is crying, one is on her bed pretending to be a cow that trips and falls, one is complaining that it’s waaaay to early to go to bed, and the others are just in some general pattern of get off bed, go to bathroom, get distracted doing something else, back to bed, repeat.  Finally they were all in bed and it was time to feed the baby when from one bedroom began the “chirping” of a “bird.”

I asked my husband, “Were you aware we had canaries?”  And we burst out laughing.  Then one daughter pops out of bed to give us a handwritten note about how we’re “Laffy Taffy’s”.  Someone else suddenly has a split fingernail and wants some superglue, and another decides to start calling us on her cell phone as she walks down the hall to check it in for the night.

And when it’s all over, I realize that I feel like the Mom who just threw a birthday party.  You know, the kind when a couple of kids turn the action up a few notches, and the noise levels continue to rise until you wonder if you’ll have a nervous twitch when the day is over.  They run, jump, eat, play, run some more, laugh, yell, scream, play games, run some more, and then all of a sudden their parents come pick them all up and you smile and thank them for coming and shut the door and sink down in a chair in a state of  exhaustion.  You think how crazy it was and how tired you are and how fun it was and how glad you are that it’s over.  And how nice it is that birthdays only come once a year.

Except that it wasn’t a birthday party.  Nobody came to pick anybody up.  They’re all my own kids, and I get to do this again tomorrow.

And you know what?  I’m looking forward to it.

Oh yes, the days are long, but the weeks, months and years fly by.  The stage I’m in feels awfully hard a lot of the time, but I know it won’t last and someday I’ll miss the silly antics of childhood.  So you sweep the floor, pick up the stray toys, pray for wisdom and perspective, and essentially reset it all for another day.  And while you’re busy just absorbing them for what they are now, they’re quietly, almost imperceptibly changing.  Then one night you go from room to room to look at them all as they sleep, to kiss their foreheads no matter how big they are, to marvel at how little some of them look and how some of the others fill their beds more than you realized, and you wish you could just pick them each up and rock them in your arms like you did on the day you first met them, and you wonder….

baby

could life POSSIBLY get any better?

Oh what a privilege, this adventure called motherhood.  Hang on, you’re in for the ride of your life!

Jennifer

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